An update. (by Toussaint Schroders)
Toussaint’s blog

It has been a while since I wrote here. Everyone who responded here and in person, thank you! To have cancer and lead a life beside that unwanted and pushy guest is a daytime job. In my case I have been through an abyss at times. The chemo seems to work fine, but is undermining my energy levels. Well it could be the chemo, as it is not likely that the cancer itself is causing the fatigue. I find myself sitting in a wheelchair. A barrier I fought against for too long and too self-willed. Now I do use the thing, it is a wonderful tool. I am being moved. Thanks to and with aid from my dear partner I am getting places now without panting for ten minutes getting my breath. Professionals at ferries and taxis proof to know what they are doing and are friendly assistants. I shall probably meet a grumpy person now and then, but I shall always remember I came across these kind people during my first wheelchair experiences.

Fortunately the oncologist had a good cure: a few days with no chemo, then start again but with a lower dose. Eventually the body has to be in such shape that it can deliver resistance to the cancer. And that chemo also needs a body in reasonable shape to do the work. The short interruption has worked, I started chemo again but I have recovered enough to be able to at some food now, the mood is better and the fatigue a lot less.

About this fatigue: I had no idea this was possible. I call it a sort of “perverse fatigue” and not in the sense of Freud’s meaning to this concept, but more as unnatural, unwanted and disgusting. It is fine to be tired, very tired even, after a chore, sport or other performance. It is different when swaying your legs out of bed is enough to make your body scream “tired, back to bed” . I hear this from more people with chemo, the only comfort is that it will pass.
Fortunately there are more things to fill my life with, apart from being “cancer patient”. With thanks to my dear ones I was able to have a wonderful turn of the year. Intensive beach- and nature drives with friends to show us around. Wonderful hours which I shall never forget.

And I feel strongly involved again in local politics. Even if the voice is a bit wheezy and I can’t attend everything, I am there and I contribute. I also get annoyed over ranting and negativism. I worry about plans the government has with our island. And think along with plans and intentions concerning the future, when I won’t be here anymore, as of course most of us do, but with a diagnosis as mine, it is made crystal clear to a person Strangely enough that doesn’t bother me, it is more of a stimulants. Even when all my atoms shall be absorbed by the universe, life will go on here and it is a stimulating and positive idea to think of that already, and to try and leave things in a reasonable state for our offspring.

I shall leave it at this on this lovely Sundaymorning (Feb. 15). The truce in Ukraine not yet shot to pieces, but people killed in Copenhagen and as it looks now, our freedom of speech and diversity threathened again. The world goes on, sometimes incredibly barbaric, sometimes heartwarmingly beautiful.
Like our National Thinker said: “Everyone can die, but to make something of life before that, is a lot of fuss.”

Comments on: "Life goes on, even with stomach cancer" (15)

  1. This is such a beautiful post Ina, and an encouraging update for us all to read. Toussaint and yourself are showing great courage within the acceptance of your situation, and this whole piece is a source of great inspiration. My love and thoughts for you and your family continue and when I am experiencing some of my unpredictable low days I will try to remember this post. Thank you for sharing. Much L&H ❤️ Xxx

  2. Beautiful post, and it makes me more aware of people like you, in your situation, and toy to the courage you employ to get through an ordinary day. I am glad things are better for you, and look forward to hearing that you are on the winning streak back to full health

    • Hi Peter, thank you very much. The days are different every time, some better some worse, but the good days count double!

  3. Reading this, this morning, Ina, the words “the truth shall set you free” echoed in my mind, and Toussaint’s expression, also, of things being “krystal clear.” I admire the way you two are taking this journey, and thank you for sharing glimpses with us along the way.
    Warmest wishes. ❤

  4. Colin Morley said:

    I admire Toussaint’s (and your) strength in adversity. I hope I can always be that positive in my own life. Wishing you both well.

  5. nettie Schroders. said:

    Hoi toes en Ina ik kan alleen bewondering voor jullie op brengen hoe jullie met de vreselijke indringer om gaan,Die rolstoel dat is een handig vreselijk ding,Wens dat de kracht weer een beetje terug komt.Ze zeggen liefde kan alles aan,Weet het niet ,wel veel.Ik hoop dat de tij snel keert.Veel liefs Nettie, Donnie.

  6. Despite what is hellish thing to conquer you have written a post full of positivity and inspiration. Yes, now is the only time we can make a difference. Your desire to do so and the strength required to do it in the face of adversity is phenomenal. May you be blessed with full health and strength in the coming weeks and months to live more of the life flowing strongly within you.x

  7. I admire your perspective Toussaint and am pleased to note that life is bearable and continues to motivate you. The best of Irish luck to you – if needed 🙂

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