The maze

Lost at times in time and mind and never really found,
playing hide and seek with shadows of your past.
Emotions are best players in this game.

Lost, your name is mentioned nowhere, no familiar voices,
you have no one to go to, thoughts live in a maze.
To be alone is not a phase; it is forever.

Lost again and this time serious, an end,
here is no difference between your nightmares and reality.
Now all is lost and life is over: this – you know.

Found as you are in what is called psychosis
and this means constant nightmare. No escape.
A prison cell where you hear screaming in the darkness.
But you won’t tell. No, you won’t tell. You promised.

Comments on: "The maze" (6)

  1. Unsettling of course, and the last line makes you wonder about the circumstances even more

    • A psychosis, after child birth. It happens a lot really. It means you are out of reality for a while, (21 years ago, 16 days in hospital in my case, which is very short! ) Luckily there are good medicins to cure it 🙂 And it doesn’t mean you are mentally ill or will be like this for ever. It also is nothing to be ashamed off. It just feels like your life is over when you are in the middle of it and you don’t know what is going on. Very scary, worst time of my life.

  2. Well done Ina,

    It is important it seems to me that those of us who have been through such experiences are prepared to talk about them.
    That way we provide support and comfort for others.

    Arohanui

    David xxx

    • Hi David, thank you. I was reluctant to posting as you know, as it is so personal. Maybe someone finds it useful, not sure. If someone is in this psychosis, I think the best thing is to make sure she knows it will end, that what she thinks is happening, is a sort of nightmare, and that she knows where she is and that her baby is okay. Last thing is most important to know. I did not know any of these things, they didn’t tell me anything.

      Arohanui,
      xxx

  3. Its a good poem Ina, and a reminder of a scary place where I have been.

    I agree totally with what David said.

    L&H xx

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