Chased

We chased the idiot out of the village.
He was blamed for the arson and flood
as all the Jews were already gone and dead.
And he lied so much, mother, he lied so much.
so we ran him out of town and chased him away.
He had it coming, he had scared us, mother.

He was crying and demanding his mother
whom he called Maria, when he left our village.
We were so glad he finally went far away.
He was stoned to death, there was a red flood,
so much blood, mother, all his fault, so much
did we hate him, for all that he did he is dead.

We can all be glad now the village idiot is dead
and he can’t hide behind the apron of his mother
where he would scold and scare us so much
that we were about to give up the village,
especially after the days of the horrible flood,
when even the nuns were afraid and went away.

Now the village idiot is finally away
and if it is true what they say, then he is dead,
they have thrown his burned corpse in the flood
and the only one crying was his old mother,
who will never go back to this village
where the idiot was hated so much.

Now we can have a feast and drink much
as the son of god and his mother both are away,
we can now make our own rules in the village
without worrying what may be once we’re dead,
and do you remember that face of the mother?
No, it is good that they’re gone in the flood.

There was so much red drifting away in the flood
But we hated him, mother, we hated so much!
He was human like us, as he too had a mother.
Why could he not just have gone far away?
He is haunting me mother, though he is dead
I don’t think he ever will leave our village.

His mother and him are now drifting in the flood,
gone from the village where happened so much,
but is he away, mother, now he is gone, really dead

 

entry for thursday poets rally sept. 2011 (week 21 or 52)

 

Advertisements

Comments on: "Chased" (51)

  1. I am trying to do Sestina’s and I have many questions, like about the tercet: in the end; on Wikipedia http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sestina I find the ending words of line 6 and 2, 1 and 4 and 5 and 3 have to be woven in 3 lines, but in Staying Alive I read the lines of the tercet have to end with the last words from line 5,3,1, and 2 4 and 6 woven in it.

    On this page http://www.baymoon.com/~ariadne/form/sestina.htm I found the last words of the tercets have to be the last words of the lines 2,4 and 3 of the first sestet. 🙂 so I changed it that way.

    I hope someone can tell me which is the right way to do the tercet. 🙂

    ps: the poem is about the way “we” have dealt with religion after WWII 🙂 I thought I better explain as I am not sure the thing is making sense. It was only a second attempt to a Sestina, they might get better if I keep trying.

  2. This is one terrific poem.

    You are tackling big subjects and make us, as readers, stop and consider our own views

    It is not an easy poem but is well worth repeated reading.

    I don’t know enough about sestinas to comment on that, but the poem seems in no way constrained by the discipline you are trying to use and that is a mark of a good poem.

    Really well done

    Love
    David

  3. Wow, Ina, this sounds complicated , challenging and is totally out of my league at this present time!!

    However, without knowing anything about Sestinas and tercets etc I think the poem is fabulous, very powerful,disturbing and beautifully written.

    Love and hugs

    Christine xx

  4. Hi Christine, thank you, I just googled “poetry forms” and I read about it also in Staying alive, I have no idea if it is in my league or not, never thought about it, I suppose we only can tell if we just try! It was not difficult to do, but then I am not sure I did it the way it is supposed to be done. I am convinced you would write them very well. You can do poems!

    Love and hugs! 🙂

  5. Striking imagery and powerful prose, I particularly love that last line… “but is he away, mother, now he is gone, really dead?” Well done Ina! Just trying out the Sestina form as well. I do enjoy it but it’s not the right fit for me, good luck!

    • Hi Apryl, thank you very much. I hope to learn how to do them, I think I like the form as it leaves a lot of freedom for a story.

  6. Imploring style, conversational expressive of the inner fears, the frustration of unjust and unfair rules and finally when the antagonist ‘dies’ or ‘is killed’ the feeling of relief mixed with the uncertainty of the future. A real good narrative poem.Well expressed.

  7. I thought this poem very haunting, very frightening. It actually could apply to more than just treatment of religion after WWII. One pattern I have indicates that the end word of the first six lines are repeat as mid and ending words of the last three lines as a-b, c-d, e-f, although another pattern I had indicated all six words must be used as mid and end words in the last three, but not necessarily in the same order as in the first three. If the poem is effective, does this small distinction matter so much?

    • Hi Larry, thank you very much for your comment, about the form, I think I have to be able to do them the way they should before letting go of the rules.

  8. I know nothing of poetry forms, Ina, but this is one deep and disturbing write. I mean this in a good way, because it makes one think and look at something differently. It is an awesome reading experience! Very nicely done.
    I know you’ve already seen this, but perhaps some of yur readers might like to take a look at it: http://charleslmashburn.wordpress.com/2011/09/21/in-the-blink-of-an-eye/

  9. I don’t know different poetry forms – I just know how I feel when I read them. This poem has so much going for it – different levels almost. I had to read it several times because it really made me think. Thank you for this wonderful poem.

    • Hi Kevin, thank you very much! I tried to comment on your blog, but I can’t, I keep getting a message that the word verification is not right. I want to say you did a great job with your poem bout war.

  10. Really loved your Sestina. I wrote one and found it fun and challanging. You are a poet!

  11. I thought it was a bit repetitive, but then I read what a sestina is. Good poem.
    And yeah I totally got all the religious connotations, and what you were saying. 🙂

  12. Wow so filled with emotions about how you wish he was dead and how you wanted to chance him away. You were filled with so much hate inside of you for this poor soul that you did not care if he was dead but now he haunts you so because of your actions. This is so sad and so true in real life we do this to people then our guilt takes over and we can not stop thinking of what we have done.
    http://gatelesspassage.com/2011/09/21/remember-the-years/

    • Hi Sarah, thank you for your comment. The “me” in this poem I hope is not me, but I suppose some of my darker inner self is reflecting. (scary thought!) 🙂

  13. I love your commitment to the voice throughout the poem. It has a dramatic presence that is well done. Here’s mine:
    http://tappingthewall.wordpress.com/2011/09/22/stars/

  14. sestina leaves me in concentinas ina.. but i am glad you made a bold statement out of something i could never understand nor categorize.. and it is very bold attempt.. 🙂 tq for coming by my friend..

  15. Oh my … this is complicated, you have courage … for this is difficult.

  16. strong emotions, it is sad to have flood and lost.

    thanks for sharing.

  17. Good luck with the sestinas, you’re brave to try and I don’t know if you’ve achieved the sestina layout you were after, but you’ve certainly written a brilliant piece.

  18. We all feel like the village idiot some days, but allowing ourselves not to display the foolishness pushes an individual to be better.

    http://mrblaque78.wordpress.com/2011/09/26/fiery-one/

  19. He is haunting and I don’t think he’ll ever leave, either.

    Good work.

  20. Yikes! Awesome! I have to come back and read your “story” “Prose” “poem” …who cares?? this was a very fine piece to read. thank you…and thank you Poetic Palace for inviting me to this poet.

  21. This is haunting and disturbing and very very well done. I usually don’t like religious poetry, but this is amazing.

    • Thank you Classic NYer, I don’t think it was meant to sound religious, well I didn’t mean to, more how religion dissapeared.

  22. I found it haunting but not scary,and sad but not terrifying.
    Loneliness was told about in a very sensitive manner!

  23. A.B. Thomas said:

    Loved the darkness of the sestina – you’ve crafted a great story within the framework

  24. This is extremey thought provoking in so many ways. The thought of a Sestina as a new styles is to explore is on my to do list.
    Lovely,
    isadora

  25. an outstanding piece indeed,

    http://gooseberrygoespoetic.blogspot.com/2011/10/poetic-reflections-week-11.html

    letting you know that your poetic reflection is posted this week.

    welcome joining us any time when you are able.

    best wishes.

    welcome joining us for week 11 picnic, anything spooky, orange color related, or autumn related are welcome,

    Thanks for the outstanding contribution to the community, you rock.

    • Thank you Jingle, also for the poetic reflection. I found a poem for the picnic, I hope it is on theme.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: