The girl in the wheat

“I just know it was there!”
It was gone, the airplane that she had seen earlier that day. The wheat in the field was waving and whispering, but no airplane. The girl in the red blouse felt disappointment.

Her father shook his head.
“You must have been mistaken. There is nothing here. Come on, you must help your mother now.”
She took her basket of wheat and started walking back to the farmhouse slowly. Could she really have been so mistaken?
The sky was blue that moment. The field was covered with yellow wheat. An ordinary Summer’s day.
And then, out of the blue, the double-decker airplane appeared over her head, the pilot waved before he took a loop and went to the distance from where she could hear the artillery near Thiaumont, heavy 420mm shell fire.
“See?” she said, pointing in the air triumphantly. Her father nodded. The war was approaching.

June 21, 1916

entry for bluebellbooks short story slam week 8

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Comments on: "The girl in the wheat" (22)

  1. Oh, the last line; it jumped out and slapped me! Awesome writing, Ina! I love it.

    Here is my story for week 8: http://charleslmashburn.wordpress.com/2011/08/18/amber-waves-of-grain/

  2. Well done! I enjoyed both this and the poem before it.

  3. Hi Donna, thank you very much 🙂 I am glad you enjoyed them!

  4. This is so good Ina.

    Just for my information is this a poem, a prose poem or a piece of prose? Would you call it a mini story? I am just interested to learn.

    I wanted to read on!

    Love and hugs

    Christine xx

    • Hallo Christine, thank you very much! This was written for the short story slam, I don’t have time to write a real story, so I wrote a very short one. It is no poetry, I read the word “vingette” today to discribe it. I wanted to write on lol and make it a nice fat novel! 🙂

      (The pilot would be wounded and she helps him, later they meet again, romance, another war etc. )

      Love and hugs!

  5. jennifaye said:

    good take on the war angle. 🙂 found your blog through bluebell books story slam. great post. 🙂

  6. the war is approaching?

    read every word, loved the story.
    thanks.

    • Hi Cello Strings.

      Not sure, is approaching not the right word? (“It came more close by”, I meant.)

      Thank you for your comment! 🙂

  7. Well written piece ..superb write on prompt indeed… how varied thoughts go through everyone when they look at the same prompt…thanks for share

  8. “Approaching” is absolutely the right word!

    You are, as I may have said before, a superb story-teller.

    David

  9. apt story, thanks for sharing.

    🙂

  10. I like your take on the prompt … it’s different but it worked well !

  11. quite a strong image there… especially with the last line! well done 🙂

  12. Thank you e.a.s!

  13. special perspective, well done story.

    🙂

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